I sit here at almost day break, after an unsatisfactory chat with someone I waited up for almost halfway across the world for… and these distances really don’t make sense to me.

And I am really lonesome here… with Norah’s honeyed voice supplementing my need for expression beautifully… (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5NHLsrWAw9k )

These are rare times when even your lover is also not sufficient for that deep emotional need that you can neither understand nor express… it just lies awake, bare open, like a nest-less bird quivering under the cold night sky in the silver moonlight of quiet.

And everytime I search in my head for someone to call or drop a line to, who can make me feel whole or satisfied again…by mere company, and lack of judgement for me feeling “incomplete”…not judging by the count of friends or wealth or laurels of the past, I find my address book still empty of such a person…even after all these years and all these relationships. Someone to sit down with beside the still lake silently reflecting the quiet strength of the mountains yonder. One doesn’t need words necessarily for comfort…a feeling of togetherness and companionship is all that is enough…like the migrating bird resting for a while on a flagpole of a docked ship.

The air is indeed still, and the early morning birds chirp awake as I make my way toward my bed, wanting to be somewhere else (Interlaken maybe…)… a place that ensconces me, making me feel complete just by being there.

I miss thee, meine liebe Schweiz… and nothing will compare to your humble splendour. I feel homesick for the first time for a place that is not even my birthplace…where I don’t mind working long hours, just to be able to reach the Brienzsee during the weekend and feeling one with the Universe.

I hope I see you soon…

But till then, yes.. I am lonesome.

Keep Holding On

You’re not alone
Together we stand
I’ll be by your side, you know I’ll take your hand
When it gets cold
And it feels like the end
There’s no place to go
You know I won’t give in
No I won’t give in

Keep holding on
‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through
Just stay strong
‘Cause you know I’m here for you, I’m here for you
There’s nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There’s no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through

So far away
I wish you were here
Before it’s too late, this could all disappear
Before the doors close
And it comes to an end
With you by my side I will fight and defend
I’ll fight and defend
Yeah, yeah

Keep holding on
‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through
Just stay strong
‘Cause you know I’m here for you, I’m here for you
There’s nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There’s no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through

Hear me when I say, when I say I believe
Nothing’s gonna change, nothing’s gonna change destiny
Whatever’s meant to be will work out perfectly
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

La da da da
La da da da
La da da da da da da da da

Keep holding on
‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through
Just stay strong
‘Cause you know I’m here for you, I’m here for you
There’s nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There’s no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through

Keep holding on
Keep holding on

There’s nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There’s no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through

Dedicated to my cheri frere… who’s been forever there beside me,

even before he was born…

Like an Angel…and a bit of a naughty kid…as i always dreamt for him to be…

As Sapphira is always beside the Rider… i will always be there beside u,

If not in person, always in Soul.

The bestest part of my Life, is U dear licky.

i miss u!!!

~Dee Dee

(chorus)
Beyond your reach
Beyond your hate
Beneath your love
Beyond your faith, i shall lay.

I brood in my tomb of silence about
  the bygone days
If that’s the only way to keep in touch
  when you deign
To show me that somewhere for me you
  still care
And you’ve not yet undone ‘us’
  thru your strength.

(chorus)
Beyond your reach
Beyond your hate
Beneath your love
Beyond your scathe, i shall remain.

Don’t fake aloofness cos you’ll just
  fail my respect
N when u do that, i so wanna
  slap you in your face
You’re burning this love up like
  one of your cigarettes
Wake up before you become unloved like
  the whore next to you in your train.
 (Bridge)
Wake up before you feel like
  a wasted doll at your desk.

(chorus)
Beyond your greed
Beyond your pride
Beneath your love
Beyond your vanity, i’ll dig my grave.

10 (crazy) things i’d like to do in the next 5 yrs…

• Take a pilgrimage down the road of San Tiago (thanks to Paulo Coelho!!).
• Become a past-life regression therapist… taking lessons from the wonderful Dr. K Newton for the same.
• Learn kick boxing or some form of self-defense mechanism.
• Build my own home.
• Adopt a child – preferably an Indian girl.
• Learn the violin in a school of music in Vienna, Austria.
• Travel a desert and stay there for atleast a week.(listen to the sounds of the sifting dunes)
• Make love on a beach by moonlight! 🙂
• Act in a foreign language film (have always desired this…!)!

Dream already achieved that was previously on my list…

• Undergo past-life regression therapy and obtain answers to the why‘s and how‘s.

The most urgent ‘dream’ to fulfill…

Let go of my past love… and not expect him back… respect his choice of staying away forever.